In a roller coaster ride of hypocrisy yesterday, the Yes on 8 Campaign filed a brief to revoke the 18,000 marriages of same-sex couples that were made between June 16th and November 4th. Yes that’s right, the very people who have sworn that their actions were meant to “protect” marriage and families, are now trying to FORCE 18,000 FAMILIES INTO DIVORCE! How does this protect marriage or the family at all?!
Do they understand how this takes their entire argument one gigantic step backwards? Granted, their arguments have always been illogical, but this just seems to take the cake. How is it possible to protect marriages and family by saying to the nation that it’s imperative the state force 18,000 families into a state of divorce? Seeing the lack of logic in their argument, the CA Attorney General quickly filed a motion to revoke Proposition 8! This was a surprise change of mind on his part and part of me wonders if the Yes on 8 hypocrisy sparked this.
That’s the message that we need to BURN into the minds of everyone around the country:
NO FORCED DIVORCE!
This effects everyone of us, regardless of the state we live in. I have heard a lot of people say lately “Why should something in California effect me?” It’s simple: If it can happen in California, it can happen ANYWHERE with ANY of our RIGHTS! In Ohio, for instance, Domestic Partnership Registries were just passed (at the city level in Cleveland). This is simply a registry – something where you can document that you’re partners. How does this harm anyone? Well, a group of proponents to this initiative have already begun planning their own version of Prop 8 to take away this registry. In Arkansas, same-sex couples were denied the right to adopt. Throughout the nation, 37 states have DOMA written into their constitution. TONIGHT is the time to illuminate the hate with love, knowledge, visibility, and honesty. NO ONE has a right to force my family into divorce!
Tonight is your opportunity to spread this message far and wide! Show the nation what our struggle is all about! Let’s LIGHT UP THE NIGHT FOR EQUAL RIGHTS!
Good Luck to ALL of you tonight. And thank you SO MUCH for all of your hard work!
28 Responses
I will not accept being forcibly divorced by religious law. Make no mistake, California’s new constitutional revision is religious law made so by a faith-based initiative. This is not about protecting marriage. It is about protecting the sanctification of religious fundamentalists through a drive to create non-secular government. Until we commit to fight ALL faith-based drives to alter secular government, we can count on this kind of action from religious fundamentalists.
I have heard much discussion concerning the impatience of the LGBT community to wait our turn for equality. According to some, we haven’t worked hard enough, suffered as much or waited long enough for 1st Class citizenship. Really?
We have been persecuted and executed by the Roman Catholic Church as sodomites for centuries. We have been labeled by the medical profession as mentally ill and we continue to be beaten and executed by other Americans. What qualifies our suffering? Nazi death camps, hot pokers up the ass, being tied to a fence and left for dead. What?
Posted on December 20th, 2008 at 5:24 pm
I grew up proud to be a San Francisco native in part because of the open attitude and acceptance of all races, religions and sexual orientations, in fact my now husband and I chose to have our civil ceremony last July at San Francisco City hall in honor of the right for EVERYONE to be married. We we’re so excited to be surrounded by so many different and same sex couples celebrating their love, but frankly now for the first time in my life I’m embarrassed to be associated with a state that would support something like Prop 8. I just found out about the light up the night events and am too late to participate in the New York events (where I live now), please have more demonstrations, I would love to participate, I will keep checking this site and I’ve encouraged all my friends and family to sign the petition to be sent to Obama about Warren!
Posted on December 20th, 2008 at 8:06 pm
If there is a law against the marriage then the only option is to annul them. The law has to change in order for them to be valid. Right now the court has ruled that prop 8 is effective. So the law needs to be applied. Obama can’t do anything about this. I doubt he will.
Posted on December 20th, 2008 at 9:24 pm
Hi Bristol,
Actually, it is not actually legal to void these marriages. They occurred while it was legal to be married. Common legalities state that any actions or contracts made while a certain law was in practice must be held even when that law is revoked. Therefor, to take away these marriages would undo many many years of practiced law across the country. It’s a grandfather clause that Prop 8 cannot legally nullify.
Amy
Posted on December 20th, 2008 at 9:31 pm
Actually, Bristol, new laws being passed are more complicated than that. They do not apply retroactively to previous acts. For example, if you shared music online when there was no rulling on its legality and the next year it was ruled to be illegal, would you expect to be prosecuted? No. Those marriages that took place before the Prop 8 passed were valid then and are valid now. The proposition cannot retroactively nullify legal marriages. That’s ridiculous.
Posted on December 20th, 2008 at 9:33 pm
We lost this fight. Time to move on. This whole situation is bigger than us and we can’t win. I believe we should just live our lives and make the best of it that we can. We’ll only bring greater disrespect and contempt upon us. It’s not right what we are doing.
Posted on December 20th, 2008 at 10:04 pm
We can never give up! We must continue to be examples, we must continue to be role models, and we must continue the good fight! To back down on attempting to achieve our equal rights is a heinous and irresponsible move which will hurt us, and future generations of lgbtq people. To borrow from Harvey Milk, we’ve gotta’ have hope!
Posted on December 20th, 2008 at 10:48 pm
I actually do not believe that you are saying these things Bristol and I honestly question the reasoning behind your posts. This type of defeatist attitude is not what we are all about. The “loss” is a temporary setback that only made us more motivated and stronger. I will not stop fighting and advocating for myself and for everyone else who wants to marry.
YES WE WILL.
Posted on December 20th, 2008 at 11:52 pm
Bristol, I must respectfully disagree. With the same outlook that you are espousing, women would still not be able to vote, slavery would still be legal here – because we would still be a British colony. Wrong does not become right merely because the majority agrees that it is right. We must be willing to face injustice wherever we can. I will leave you with two quotations from a highly regarded man who fought to change the laws of his land – Mohandas Ghandi.
“An unjust law is itself a species of violence. Arrest for its breach is more so. ”
“In matters of conscience, the law of the majority has no place. “
Posted on December 21st, 2008 at 2:08 am
Well, Daniel I guess that’s where the American people might disagree. The majority does have a place in matters of conscience. Rights are given to us by society. We have the right to bear arms in this country. We don’t in the UK. Should people just disregard the law and buy guns because they disagree with it? In some European countries you don’t have a right to an attorney if arrested. I know this is also true in Japan. Should all prisoners be released because of this ? Do we have the right to break them out. Besides, we can’t compare ourselves to other minorities because that can’t choose who or what they are in public. For us, we didn’t choose to be gay but we did choose a gay lifestyle and that is what people are upset about. Lifestyles are choices and there lies the issue and one we will not win because it is a choice not an event out of our control like being of a certain race or ethnic origin. There are so many more important things going on in the world right now that are far greater than our issues. We should look at some of the bigger issues in todays world and try to help there instead of complaining about our small problems. Millions have died in Africa these past few years because of war and poverty and brutal regimes. Idon’t see any gays concerned about those peoples rights. Take a look aroung you and be grateful for what you do have instead of always wanting more while so many others have less. You have a great life. Be thankful.
Posted on December 21st, 2008 at 7:21 am
Bristol,
I strongly disagree with your gay lifestyle statement, but there is no shortage of argument on that issue, so I will leave in there. I do agree that there are myriad atrocities in other parts of the world that should be considered and please do not assume that because we are fighting for LGBT rights in America, we have lost sight of the conditions that exist in other countries. We have not. That said, if we stop fighting faith-based homophobic policies in the U.S., we will see a rise in homosexual suffering in America and throughout the rest of the world. I grant that we have many freedoms in America, but in the last year hate crimes against homosexuals increased. When we decide to count ourselves lucky for what we have and settle into complacency, we will see a progression of unsolicited attacks on our “lifestyle.” The UN recently declared that LGBT people worldwide should be protected and that homosexuality should be decriminalized. The United States of America does not agree with the UN. If LGBT rights in America are put down, how do you think LGBT people in other parts of the world will fare? Bristol, humanity is at war against itself, and we must each choose our battles and our strategies. However, please try to understand that no matter how small you perceive one human rights battle to be, they are all connected and they are all important.
Posted on December 21st, 2008 at 12:03 pm
Bristol says: “…but we did choose a gay lifestyle…”
I’m a little embarrassed to share this, but what the heck, it’s the internet: It took me a very long time to come to terms with my sexuality. I pretended to be straight. I had every justification imaginable. I can say with absolute certainty that yes, you can *choose* away happiness, for a while anyway… but why? It was a miserable existence and I’m so happy it’s over. I resent your comment because the difference in my outlook on life and my attitude is so much improved now, it doesn’t *really* seem like a choice. No one should have to make a choice like that. I, for one, will keep up the fight, popular votes be damned, until we win it.
Posted on December 21st, 2008 at 12:57 pm
Bristol,
I am not sure I understand why you are even on the website, given your views. Why did you Join the Impact, if you think there are bigger issues to focus on? I don’t disagree that there are plenty of other examples of injustice in our country. So, if you don’t feel strongly about this one, then move on! As someone who did get married and is one of the 18,000 affected, I plan to continue the fight, not only for myself, but for all the others that no longer have the right.
Posted on December 21st, 2008 at 5:44 pm
Aloha Governor Arnold,
We travelled to your state in October of 2008 to marry. It was legal. We incurred expenses to travel to your State because it was legal. We were married in Santa Ana which was witnessed by our 9 year old daugter. It was wonderful to have this experience and for this to be legal. We arrived on October 3rd and returned to our home state of Hawaii on October 13th. We honeymooned in your State because it was legal. We visited Disneyland on Gay day and purchased tickets to Hannah Montana’s 16th birthday party only because we happened to be there with our 9 year old daughter as we were getting married because it was legal. We ventured down to Huntington Beach to bask in our newly wed status because it was legal and had a lovely bonfire on the beach supported by the Hilton Hotel who were glad to have us because it was legal.
Now your State is attempting to take away what was legal to us.
If this is the case, we respectfully request a refund of the County Clerk fees and all expenses your State cost us to falsely come to California to marry. Your re-imbursement will allow us to go to another State where it really is LEGAL.
Mahalo,
Dana Hesse
Posted on December 21st, 2008 at 7:17 pm
Bristol, I find it amusing that you assume I am gay. Is it because I choose to stand up for the rights of others who are having their rights TAKEN AWAY? Please note the emphasis – the right to marry WAS legal, and now it has been taken away. A prominent attorney proposes to annul 12,000 marriages that are legal under the law. I am a minority where I live, simply because I don’t believe that this is right. Straight male, white, middle-aged, in the middle of the Bible Belt of the United States – and I refuse to change my mind, my beliefs, or my actions because of the close-minded actions of others. The majority may have a place in matter of law, but NOT in conscience. If you cannot stand up for what you believe in, no matter what that may cost you, then you do not have any beliefs. You are leaf at the mercy of the winds, doomed to be blown wherever it takes you. I choose to be the oak, standing in the midst of the wind, refusing to bow, regardless of how fiercely it blows. I do look around, I AM thankful for the rights I have as a straight male – I just believe in my heart that my sexual orientation shouldn’t be the determining factor for those rights.
As for your statements about the rule of law in other countries – I do what I can, through the efforts of groups like Amnesty International, UNICEF and many others to improve the lives of others as much as I can. I at NO point proposed breaking the law, which is what you implied. I propose CHANGING the law. Great people throughout history have fought, peacefully and otherwise, to accomplish this same goal for various other rights. By your reasoning, no one should try and change what the majority rules as being law, regardless of what that law says.
If you do not see gays concerned about human rights elsewhere, perhaps you should take a closer look around, and ask some questions. Personally, I have found people who are gay to be FAR more concerned, and willing to donate of their time and money, than many other people. By painting an entire group with such a broad brush, you are doing the LGBT community no favors – they are individuals, people who have their own joys and concerns outside of their orientation. When we lump people into groups, it becomes easier for the human mind to justify inflicting hurts upon them. So please, stop doing this, if only in your own mind – if we can convince more people to do this, to see that its not ‘those gays’ but ‘Karen from bookkeeping’ or ‘Mike the pizza dude’ – then we might actually be able to make some progress.
Posted on December 21st, 2008 at 7:48 pm
Daniel, I’m sorry to say that many people who voted the first time around (pre prop 8) feel their rights were taken away. Do we not also judge everyone who doesn’t agree with us as “facist right wing pigs” . Read some of these posts. Is this tolerence and dialogue? At least when Barak Obama invited Rick Warren he proved his willingness to listen and communicate. We on the other hand are having a temper tantrum about it. This makes us look bad. Further more it is your right to stand up for what you believe in as long as you can give that same respect to others. We need to work on doing that. LGBTQ are trying to get marriage rights. OK, I guess now Mormons can use the same arguement and demand the right of polygamy. You can’t say this is a violation of womens rights since these women would willingly choose to do this. Marriage is a right, but, it always had juridical restrictions.
Posted on December 21st, 2008 at 10:05 pm
Bristol, I understand what you mean about the previous vote. They disagreed with the law, they rallied and had it changed. The folks here are merely doing the same thing. I live in Nebraska, and I really wish you could have been part of some of the ‘discussions’ that were had by people here…people who donated money to the Prop 8 campaign. Tolerance was not even remotely close to what was said. Personally, your argument about polygamy fails with me – I agree that as long as the rights of and the protection of minors are not violated (a concern with that branch of Mormonism – marriage at age 12 was not unheard of) that they should be allowed to do what they like. I guess we will just have to agree to disagree, but I do wonder why you are choosing to speak your piece here. If you think you have faced hostility here, you should try going to some of the Prop 8 sites that were up, and read the reactions to the gays that tried to engage some of those folks in ‘tolerance and dialogue’.
Posted on December 21st, 2008 at 10:33 pm
Bristol,
Frankly, I am beginning to wonder if you are an imposter. That said, please try to understand that most of us are not asking for acceptance from the religious community. We are asking for equality. Furthermore, some faith communities are tolerant and some are not. The LGBT community is not anti-religious, but in the U.S., the church has no business in government. May I recommend that you read the U.S. Constitution and several other texts, including the bible, before you argue further.
Posted on December 22nd, 2008 at 1:27 am
Corey, If you imply that people who are part of a religious affiliation have no business in government then the majority of the people in this country would have no voice at all. Gays still have a voice and opportunity to participate in government. People of religious backgrounds shouldn’t be denied the same right. And I reiterate that marriage has always had juridical restrictions. I also have a question for Daniel. Are you saying that polygamy should be allowed? A simple yes or no would do. I am also using this site since it is discussing the issue of gay marriage. What better place.
Posted on December 22nd, 2008 at 2:50 am
Bristol is definitely a shill for the anti-gay marriage people. She’s a representative of the new effort by our enemies to breed dissent among us. They are thrilled that we’re so at odds with Obama about Rick Warren and they hope we can be demoralized by these kind of postings from “Bristol”. I’ve been to enough marriage equality rallies and personally witnessed this kind of infiltration before from the homophobes. They think we’re stupid enough to stop moving forward if they suggest to us that we might not win. Fuck that. We’re going to win if it takes a thousand years, and we’re never going to stop until we do. It took almost a hundred years of political agitation for women to gain the right to vote in this country. We’re not going to listen to the spies and naysayers who would rob us of our will!
Posted on December 22nd, 2008 at 3:29 am
Bristol, as much as you may wish it, life is not either/or proposition. And why exactly are you choosing to disregard all my other words, and focus solely on the subject of polygamy? What does that have to do with gay marriage rights? If you can present me with constructive arguments, fine. Otherwise, I am no longer going to allow myself to be sidetracked or dismissed utterly by your statements. Your argument to Corey changed his statement from “but in the U.S., the church has no business in government”, meaning organized religious views are not permitted by our Constitution to be enacted into law – you changed this into “imply that people who are part of a religious affiliation have no business in government”, which means that those of religious faith are not allowed to participate in our government. Quit twisting people’s words, quit sidetracking the arguments, and please present your rational arguments why people should roll over, play dead, and have their right to “Life, Liberty and the Pursuit of Happiness” taken away from them due to their sexual orientation.
Posted on December 22nd, 2008 at 4:52 am
Pauliji my words are only to get us to think of better ways to communicate. Anger and name calling is no use. Yes Rick Warren is saying the invocation at the inaugeration. So what? Does President Obama always need to clear his ideas through the gay community before he does anything. He is proving his tolerance and inclusiveness you are not. Daniel the issue of Polygamy is relavent because marriage is a fundemental right as we claim but the right to marry more than one spouse was denied to people when it was part of their faith. So their religious and civel rights were violated. They can’t marry more than one person even if it is a part of your religious belief. So logically if the mormons can have restrictions put on their rights of marriage it can also be done with gays. The flip side of this is if marriage is just about anyone who is in love can get married without any interference from the state then anything goes with marriage. In short if marriage cannot be regulated by the state, then marriage can be anything a person wants it to be. Even if you don’t agree with it. It becomes a fundemental right that no one can interfere with. We want a no holds bar on marriage. This invites other problems in the future. You have tunnel vision and it is important to see how this affects things in the future and society at large.
Posted on December 22nd, 2008 at 6:22 am
Bristol, I still do not understand why you are taking the time to post on this site. There are lots of other blogs that would love the stuff that you spout off. You would be a rock star. This organization was created specifically to “promote love and equality” in your city. It started as a direct response to the passage of Prop 8, but has grown to include the broader issues of civil rights. Your ideas of comparing gay marriage to polygamy and creating “a no holds bar on marriage” sounds a bit like Rick Warren and the others that try to distort the issue. Your judgmental tone and clear lack of maturity doesn’t help make whatever points you are trying to make. Your just spouting off one thought after another and you have yet to make a point relevant to this organization and it’s cause.
Posted on December 22nd, 2008 at 11:03 am
I think all persons of conscience attending the inauguration ought to silently turn their backs on Warren as he delivers the invocation. If a large part of the audience did this, the protest would be forcefully delivered.
Posted on December 22nd, 2008 at 4:45 pm
I for one think that Bristol is a charlatan, a chimera, a ruse. I do not think that he/she is even gay, but only here to stir up dissension and discord.
My spouse and I have been together for over 29 years now, I feel that our marriage is just as valid as anyone else’ marriage. I made the choice many years ago to not have religion in my life and do not feel the church should have a say in my life. Religion needs to stay out if politics or face just and due taxation. I found out two weeks ago that because my spouse is a disable vet, that I can go to school on his GI bill. If the supporters of prop 8 get their way, I stand to lose education benefits that are available to spouses of disable vets.
Posted on December 22nd, 2008 at 6:00 pm
The crux of this issue is that it would not be an issue if secular government were protected by the enforcement of the separation of church and state. Fundamentalist Christians will consistently attempt to create religious law via government policy proposals. Every time a faith-based organization wants to slap and “In God We Trust” plaque on the wall of a government building or place a nativity scene on government property, secular government is threatened. Many American patriots fight to protect government from these types of faith-based proposals, including atheists. The California Atheists were protesting in opposition to Proposition 8 long before the election results came in because they were well aware that Proposition 8 represented a critical threat to secular government. In an effort to protect secular government and ensure equal protections for all minorities, we must stand in solidarity with Progressive Christians, African-Americans, straight persons, atheists, Latinos, and all those who believe in human rights, including reproductive rights. Reach out. Stay active.
Posted on December 23rd, 2008 at 1:10 am
I think Bristol is a Mormon that was sent here to stir up dissent. Why else would she keep harping about polygomy so much.
Please don’t feed the troll.
Posted on December 26th, 2008 at 10:58 pm
I always find the statement of “being gay is a choice” rather odd. At what age does someone decide “yeah um I think im gonna be straight. Or I think the whole gay thing is for me.” In my 26 years of life have have yet to hear directly or indirectly of anyone making that choice. It’s along the same lines of someone saying um yeah i think im gonna be a tall person.
Posted on December 31st, 2008 at 4:33 pm
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